I leave the big Rotweiler in the dust as I fake right and zip left. The big, drooling fool gives up after a few yards as I dash across the dog run, stick in my mouth and the wind in my ears. "Hey," I yell, dropping the stick. Yeah, you -- squirrel." The nerve of this guy. "I'm playing here!"

Well, it looks like I'm going to have to make this nut-chewin', bush-tailin', rat-lookin' tree-climber regret the day he crossed MY path. "YEAH, YOU!" I bark. "Don't pretend you don't hear me .... why you .... I'll tear you limb from limb. You better climb that tree and if I see your face around here again ...."

What's that? I see a bird. Gotta get the BIRD! Wait. I gotta pee. Hey, there's that big poodle. Boy, can he run. My master .... he's got a ball, no, it's a snack. It's a SNACK AND A BALL!!! Gimme the snack first, no the ball, I'll just play with the snack .... wait.... I gotta pee again.

Whoa, here comes that dribblin' Rotweiler again. "Gimme the ball," I bark. "Gimme the ball." I grab the ball on the first bounce and squeak it ferociously, antagonizing the Rotweiler, tossing my head from side to side. Whoa, here he comes. I'm running. I'm juking. I'm zigging when he's zagging. Look at me, I'm a wild coyote, I'm the king of the wolf pack. If you want to run with the big dogs, you gotta pee in the tall grass.